Workshop training reminds me of Loki

During the Naaap Convention, I attended a workshop called 'Negotiating with Strength'. Here, I was sitting in a packed room with smart people, all with good careers, listening to the speaker, and all I thought about was Loki.

"Be bigger," the speaker says.
"What do you mean?" an audience member asks.
I know what he means! I think to myself. Be like Loki. Loki thinks he's a BIG dog. Loki lies in the middle of the room, every room. He needs a queen-sized bed, all to himself.

"People tend to respect authority," the speaker explains. He demonstrates how often times in car sales, you negotiate directly to the junior salesman, who then inevitably has to ask his "manager". This makes the "manager" seem like an authority figure, making the buyer give in to this "manager". Yeah, Loki has no respect for authority... unless you have food. He has respect for food.

"Establish your superiority and others will defer to you," another tip the speaker offered.
Superiority? Definitely a Loki trait.

"People tend to be compliant," the speaker says, and demonstrates this with a volunteer from the audience.
The speaker says, "Follow me," in an authoritative voice to the audience member, who of course follows the speaker all over the room. People are compliant. Clearly, Loki is not. Do you have any idea how many times I've embarrassed myself at the dog park trying to get Loki to come? And if he weren't on a leash, heck, no way, is he going to follow me, just because I told him to.

Next time, Loki should lead the workshop... if only he could talk.